Some experts believe that an orgasm is an orgasm. Others categorize them…differentiating orgasms based on how they are experienced or what type of stimulation caused them. In my experience learning from thousands of women, here’s some info. about orgasms that may prove helpful – and inspirational, in some cases!
While women experience orgasms from many types of stimulation, here are the most popular: clitoral, g-spot, vaginal, anal, and the “fake.†(Ok, that last one is sort of a joke.) A great runner up: nipple stimulation.
Clitoral orgasms – are experienced as a result of clitoral stimulation. The clitoris is an external feature that sits on top of the vaginal opening. A “hood†of skin protects it. It has thousands of nerve endings and serves no other function other than to provide a woman with pleasure. Aliases include, “center of the universe†and “love button.†The clitoris can be stimulated by itself, or in conjunction with other types of stimulation (such as nipple, vaginal, g-spot, etc.). For many women, clitoral stimulation is required in order to have an orgasm. Be sure to stimulate the clitoris often…alone as well as while you’re having sex with a partner!
G-spot orgasms – studies have shown that all women have a g-spot, although not all women will enjoy having their g-spot stimulated (while others will absolutely love it!). We’re all different and have different comfort levels. The g-spot is located just inside the vagina (about 1-2 inches inside) on the front of the vaginal wall. Due to its location, it can be tough for a male partner to stimulate the g-spot during penetration (especially in certain positions, including the missionary position). However, it is VERY easy for a partner to locate a woman’s g-spot with their (well lubricated!) fingers….the inside of the vagina is soft and smooth (like the inside of your cheek) and the g-spot becomes more pronounced and textured (like the roof of your mouth) when stimulated.
To have a g-spot orgasm, the g-spot must be continuously stimulated for several minutes. For a woman, having the g-spot stimulated creates the sensation of needing to urinate. This can cause confusion or discomfort, as well as fear that she’ll void her bladder on the bed if she “lets go†and allows the sensation to take her over. The reason for this is the g-spot’s close proximity to the bladder and urethra…so when it swells upon stimulation, it is accompanied by a feeling of urgency to urinate. My recommendation? Be sure to empty your bladder before sex so that you won’t have that worry (as well as after – this can help avoid urinary tract infections). Also, what you MAY experience is female ejaculation…this is a release of fluid from the urethra and is commonly associated with g-spot orgasms. The fluid is NOT urine, but can dribble out or “shoot out†with a bit of force. G-spot orgasms are often felt as an “all over body release†in contrast with a clitoral or vaginal orgasm, which can be described as a “warm, pulsating feeling†that comes from the clitoral area.
Vaginal orgasm – just inside the vagina are nerve endings….more nerve endings than you would find deeper inside the vagina. When the first couple of inches inside the vagina are stimulated, an orgasm can occur. Vibrators with rotating beads in the shaft are great for vaginal massage and stimulation. Vaginal orgasms can be similar in sensation to clitoral orgasms and oftentimes are the result of simultaneous vaginal wall massage and clitoral stimulation.
Anal orgasms – while this may be a shock to many, anal sex should be pleasurable for BOTH partners. It takes time and preparation, and is not a “one night†event! “Oops, wrong hole!!†is the experience many women have had with anal penetration, and it can be tough to give the anus another try after this type of incident. Lube, desire, patience, and communication are all necessary ingredients for great anal sex for a woman. I strongly recommend, “The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women†by Tristan Taormino. For women who “bite the towel†once a year on your anniversary to participate in dreaded anal sex….STOP IT! If you’re going to do it, you should enjoy it….in fact, enjoy an orgasm from it….! Check out her tips and tricks and enjoy this “forbidden†orgasm!
Fake – I would bet that 99% of women have faked an orgasm at one time or another, and I have an entire article dedicated to this topic and why you should never “fake†an orgasm. In a nutshell, faking an orgasm is giving positive reinforcement for “bad behaviorâ€â€¦..and doesn’t serve anyone!! FIND a way to communicate with your partner what’s working and what isn’t….which can be as simple as moving their hand over and showing them how it’s done.
If you haven’t experienced all of these orgasms, you have some homework for this week, don’t you?